I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
well i just set every background of each phone in the verizon store to my face
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
Your cock deserves a montage
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
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