We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Drunkkker than when I told the drag queen she was prettier than me
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
So never has there been a greater Valentine's Day gift than you actually putting a new roll of toilet paper on for me after using the old roll up! You didn't even use the new roll. You clearly put that on from a gentleman's standpoint vs. a selfish standpoint. I love you!!!!
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I woke up this morning to find myself laying in a beer puddle with "I'm sorry" written on the shaft of my dick and Nicole was nowhere to be found. Gotta love her
I think my moral compass just broke
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize