YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I just wanna be craddled in his arms and spoon fed applesauce..
that's the most romantic thing you've ever said.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Im playing lifeguard in my own bathroom. How's ur night?
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Your liver needs more exercise - we start training tonight.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize
