marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
I've already reverted to sweat pants. And lonely drinking.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
