..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Your grammar in that last text message was so awful.. My vagina wants to go crawl in a hole, and never speak to you again.
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
I woke up to pizza pinned to my wall. So that's that.
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Your ex spoke highly of your penis and it’s skill. I’m interested in learning more about it ;-)
Randomize
