he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
So it wasn't until I came that he pointed out the glow in the dark plastic star still stuck to my forehead. Fun times.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Also, fighting a very strong urge to nickname your dick Whitey Bulger, at least for today.
I wish there were birth control emojis
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
My vagina has a mind if its own. Can you imagine if I didnt have you to run her ideas through.
EW HE LOOKS LIKE SOMEONE'S DAD
RICK BROUGHT THE HOT BARTENDER HOME. SOMEONE CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT, CUZ RICKYS ON FIIIIIIIRE.
lmao nvm she punched him in the face and left
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
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