found the other keg... it's in the tree
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
she said she's never had and orgasm AND she's a cubs fan...ouch.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
The fairy wings and cowboy hats were not the issue. The bag of cocaine that I held in the air as we drove in the parade might have been.
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
That's why my boobs are so big, they're full of secrets.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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