I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
I can't tell if your life is amazing or needs reevaluation when "did I get hit with a nightstick" is a legitimate question.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
You have not lived until you've seen your mother stumble into the house with one shoe on mumbling incoherently about tequila cupcakes.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I've had more jaegerbombs than I can count on 3 fingers
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
Randomize
