Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
This may have to wait till tomorrow. I smoked so my back wouldn't hurt and I overshot relaxed by like 4 hits casually
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
Dinner at 5, shrooms at 10.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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