he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
I mean, we were all drinking, but I'm pretty sure kidnapping came up.
you said, "the pool was totally tequila. and i left my shoe halfway across town. and by shoe i mean car" it appeared to me that you didn't have your shoes or car.
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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