So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
My natural self cock block skills kicked in last night. I could've got on like 2 chicks but i ended up throwing up all over my van instead.
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
Just got attacked by a family of raccoons, I have the worst luck.
Then she said I give the best mouth hugs and bar went silent.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Sooooo have your ex-girl console you over your ex ex girl that you destroyed said ex-girl over the possibility of
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I'm going to blackout. I realize this
Randomize
