Buhtt sex?
I want to jerk off but my dog won't leave me alone. It's the most depressing cock block ever.
FACT: the parking lot attendant was yelling "NO SEX HERE! NO SEX" at yall.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
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