Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
Something about getting whistled at in my work clothes while crossing the street with three Nuvarings in my back pocket feels wrong.
They want yo temporarily sterile ass.
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
It seems that only way I've actually improved myself after 2 years of writing for the school newspaper is that I've mastered the art of descriptive words to improve my sexting skills
Mimosa dick, like his cousin Whiskey dick, is just as ineffective but a lot more fun to be around
Not to be gross and awkward, but I just had sex outside in the rain on the hood of a lexus
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Randomize
