Just found 2 diff. colored pubes in my underwear..new record.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
Instead of medicine they should just give ecstasy. Also I'm tingly and can't find u guys. A gay man just said he loved me... :( / :)
I love my life sometimes. I do miss being an adult, from time to time, but a little vodka always changes my mind.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I lost the right to judge tonight
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
