Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
long story short: there's a file in the master file cabinet labeled "lube".
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
At least drunk me was smart enough to stash toilet paper in my bag before I started my walk home. Finally countless squat pees and wiping with grass taught me to be prepared.
Received a verbal warning at work for "riding in a trash receptacle, violating professionalism & infection control."
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
Listen man, there's two things I know about in life: porn and sound. On a day that I'm wearing khakis, I need you to trust that I know what the fuck I'm doing.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Randomize