I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Thats not how it works. You get the Rachel, and then Rachel kicks you out. Don't linger or try to cuddle, its just pathetic and makes me look down on you and your penis
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You screamed "there will be blood" and punched some random guy in the face. So no, we can't go back to that bar.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Just got a snapchat from him that was a video of with the caption "my new apartment" in Brazil. I think we might not be seeing eachother anymore.
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
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