Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
farters have to be the big spoon...
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
he needs to stop telling all his friends what my queefs sound like. its getting awkward to be around people who can quote my vagina.
His second form of ID was an emergency room wristband from an hour ago. What the fuck is going on right now
Haha yeah he had an allergic reaction to the alcohol earlier. He thinks that if he only drinks vodka he will be ok...
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
I just told my sister I love her. I'm in no condition to drive.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
You were shirtless with a cowboy hat in 15 degree weather then u shotgunned a can of mixed vegetable Progresso soup
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
Had weird bad dreams about you last night. Please tell me you didn't google my real surname and that you don't go to a needle exchange.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
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