feel weird hangin out with you now that i've eaten your sister out
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
I tolerate his mediocre drunk sex for the mind blowing morning sex. More than worth it.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
Just used the word fistfucking in a serious conversation with my professor in front of the class, while making an appropriate and valid point. Win.
Randomize
