Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
Give me a heads up the next time you BBM me a voicenote of you cumming so I'll make sure not to play it while in the car with my parents. Miss you too.
you're the best thing to happen to me. closely followed by learning to ejaculate, and drugs.
she was pretty happy for someone in the middle of a herpes outbreak, how was i supposed to know?
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Every part of me is in agreement...but mostly my vagina
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
After her AA meeting, she was on the phone with her mom, and when she said, "they're making me start over with Step 1," I quietly sang, "cut a hole in the box".
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Probably not. Getting pulled over and puking my guts out on the side of the road in front of the cop and him making fun of me, was not my finest moment. Plus I lost my debit card.
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
Randomize
