tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
she went to her friend's wedding and caught the bouquet. as the unwilling rebound, can i run away now?
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
These margaritas aren't just going to regret themselves.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
She has no problem going ass to mouth, but won't eat the pizza crust. I don't get it.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Sex in the backyard? Check.
I'm getting reacquainted with drunk me. She has grown up a lot.
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
