My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
I fell asleep with crest white strips on and ate one...
Told a girl i wanted to feel her bellybutton from the inside... I need to learn how to flirt
They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
He told me all about his plan for proposing to his girlfriend as pillow talk.
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
I hope you enjoy this collage I made of you and me getting fucked up together
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
Well, thanks for not letting me sleep with anyone, but no thanks for telling everyone I have the clap.
Randomize
