i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I said I wanted my dignity back. He brought my thong to me after sharpie-ing "dignity" on the front. I'm not sure if I should me mad or impressed.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
Damn it if I pass out in the bathroom one more time this month im going to rehab...
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
you also choked him out with your legs on the kitchen floor..
Two words that describe last night: naked and backflips.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
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