i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
she told me that she was curious about how cum tasted. of course i left you.
All i've done since I got back to my room today is take a three hour nap. Like, I even planned to change my pants and haven't even done that yet.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
