He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
This is why we can never be just regular friends. The shit we do is not regular
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
Randomize
