I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
I sent you an email today but due to work restrictions, I had to misspell choke sex
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I hate about 85% of people that I meet. I'm an awful person. In reality my only redeeming qualities are my face, my amazing scissoring skills and the fact that children love me.
True on all accounts.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
In other news I may have fractured my masturbating arm
At least it wasn't your drinking arm
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Girl behind me in line at CVS was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan B soon she might be a mom and that if we couldn't tell she'd be a horrible mom
That's good. So do you know why there is a giant pile of old tires in the laundry room and kitchen?
Well we knew you needed some tires, found someone on the way home who was giving them away and took them all. Has to be 4 in there you can use.
Randomize
