Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
She even gives head with a lisp.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
You just sat there for two solid hours staring at your monitor and every five minutes screamed "LEGOOOOOS"
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
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