Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Is 1:30 too early for the bar?
Do you want my opinion or society's?
I want your company
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Places I vomited today: hotel bathroom, in the cab to the airport, airport bathroom, airport terminal trashcan, plane seat 18E, and the plans bathroom
Fun wedding?
Yes. Very.
Randomize
