hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
she was so hammered she started drinking dishwasher detergent
I dont know whats funnier - that, or that we learned that poison control is closed at 2 AM
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
I asked you how much you drank and you replied with "I don't know what kind of toothpaste I use."
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm pretty sure the guy in front of me at Walmart doesn't have good plans. It's one am he is buying a flash light and black bandanna
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Speaking of which.. there's underwear in my backseat and Arby's cheese sauce on my door handle. So much for my new Volvo bringing out my classy side.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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