Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
I feel like our relationship should have moved on from you constantly asking if I'm gay
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
Welp, just took a tab of acid and cracked one of three bottles of champagne... Mondays ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯
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