i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
we thought you were sober enough for a movie but you took one look at emily blunt and screamed "aw this bitch?!" and passed out 30 seconds later
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Man, i was looking at the pictures i took last night in one i was on the Kentucky line fist pumping with a hobo..wth happened?
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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