i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Look at my eyebrows in this pic! We deffo need to go back to that waxing place.
You have a cock in one hand and a shot in the other. Your eyebrows are not the topic in need of discussion.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
Randomize
