we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Homegirl just dropped a candle on the floor major party foul. Thought it make you feel better.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
well ya only live once...
that cant be your answer for every horrible thing you do
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
