Can you tell me we didn't drink from a fish bowl we found in the bathroom last night? I know it would be a lie; I just need to hear it.
walking on campus just saw the exact moment some kids life got ruined
he's on the phone and just starts going "FUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCKKKKK", then follows it with "Are you sure your pregnant?"... made my day
Outta milk. Using rum instead for pancake mix. Drunk Thursday is a gooo
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
I thought if I bought the most expensive pregnancy test I would look like I had my life together
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
Randomize
