found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
If a Romanian girl's marriage isn't considered legal in the US then she's fair game right?
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
Yes, i finally made it. but let me tell you...i can smell myself right now in class right now, this scent is called alcoholism.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I had to puke in a ditch beside a cow pasture and like 50 cows just stood there and watched. I could feel the judgment.
All I can think of is a mama duck followed by her baby ducks, in brightly colored track shoes.
How high are you?
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
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