This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
pouring popcorn down my shirt before we went to the bar was the best idea ever. it was delicious and convenient.
In the middle of the State of the Union, she unzipped my pants and started giving me head. I've never been so proud to be an American.
Good morning! Just thought I'd give you my yearly reminder that we lost our virginities 7 years ago, yesterday.
That's the best creepy text ever.
What is this nonsense on the table
Your idea.
I mean the hole taco that was chewed up and spit out
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I got laid two nights in a row
And none for Gretchen Wieners...
I wanna hang out. The cats don't talk back.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
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