WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
get over here soon, theyre throwing bbeers at us from the roof. keyword : throwing
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
No, not if I told them not to. they listen to me. I have a vagina.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
Randomize
