im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
He used the expression "my couch is your couch" as a come on line.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
Just your daily reminder that we're terrible people: the average number of men a woman sleeps with in their lifetime is 4
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
So this tall girl jumped in our cab and I was like hey I have pics of u on my phone. It wasn't creepy at all
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
You guys go ahead and have your romantic night. I'm gonna keep my vday tradition alive of angry banging a stranger.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
I really need to stop turning to the BDSM dungeon masters of tinder whenever my heart hurts
Randomize
