Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
I got him a footlong to apologize for trying to push him off a balcony...
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
Today is a shit your pants at work kinda day
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
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