Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
This is actually a pretty big deal for him. I mean, he contacted a stranger out of concern for someone else instead of for sex.
That does show growth.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
As I'm trying to leave her house she shushes me and puts my hand on her boob, then goes back to sleep. In like 30seconds. What the fuck.
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
And amler is totally snoring loud as fuck sitting on the steps with her feet in a puddle of soda puke
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
After we banged he volunteered to ducksit while I went to work. I think that's true love.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
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