drank two beers while on the toilet at home during lunch break. new high or new low, not sure
Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
after last night, i judge her for not breaking up with me
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I'll only sleep there if we can bone on your balcony.
I asked him if we were going to get arrested for doing it in the bar parking lot. "Absolutly not" said the guy getting the blow job...
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
she is legit trying to fuck me to death between her and work i haven't slept in 3 days and have at least 16 hours to go before sleep is a possibility. can i crash at your place she doesnt know where you live
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