he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
I didn't pay for a single drink 'help me I'm poor' was my drink pickup line. it totally worked.
She's riding a bike down the street and drinking brown liquor. A pt cruiser is honking at her and she's like I HEAR YOU!!
Awkward is sitting in your parking spot and making eye contact with every one of your next door neighbors two hours before you have a threesome.
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
She's walking to the bar while holding a fifth of fireball, talking on the phone and puking like its nothing out of the ordinary
The modern romantic, surprising his gf w/ a gram of blow
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
Next time I say "i forgot to eat dinner, oh well" before drinking STRAP ME TO A CHAIR AND FORCE FEED ME BEFORE ALLOWING ME TO CONSUME BOOZE
Randomize
