covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
i never thought i'd have to say "please stop having sex on me"
wow.
yeah, it was that bad.
The coffee and champagne are fighting over who gets to absorb the one pancake in my stomach
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I thought i'd save money with No Heat November but the amount of whiskey i have to buy to stay warm is probably adding up to more than a heat bill.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
Roommate is eating a chimichanga, watching Dr Doolittle 2 and weeping. His Tuesday hangovers make me feel better about my life.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
I had to hose off vomit off my driveway at 9 am.....so hot
it'll be like the notebook except for with way more of my penis
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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