direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
OMG HE JUST PUKED WITH THE DOOR OPEN WHILE DRIVING ON THE ROAD AND OMG WE NEED TO CHAT BUT NOT ATM CAUSE THERES PUKE ON MY PHONE
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Heeyy... sorry I got so drunk. You probably don't ever want to see me again. Thank you for dealing with me when I tried to jump over the deli counter for some mayonnaise.
Randomize
