Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
You're right. I woke up today with my ugly sweater still on and no pants. I'd say it was a successful night.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
I just found a condom in my jolly ranchers bag. This is a good omen.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
