hell yes lets make some ravioli
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.
*roof
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
My prof handed me back my essay on Lesbians in literature, gave me an A and then we had sex in her office. Told you she was gay.
Why are there 17 orders of shrimp lo mein in the bathtub?
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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