Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
does dane cook know its not 2004 and that hes no longer relevant?
you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
I am 90% sure the kid in front of me in class is picking his face spots, smelling it, and then eating it. That is a LOT of % sure for something like that.
she always made me post sex PB&Js it was like fucking a trashier Martha Stewart
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I'm putting my hangover kit in my car for the trip to work tomorrow morning. Dedication
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Terrible idea I love it
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I went up to u at the bar, you grabbed my face and said, "hey you're Juan right?"
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
