i am so fucked up that i think i'm playing snood in my head.
well..are you winning?
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
found the other keg... it's in the tree
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
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