You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
She wanted to watch a Baby Einstein DVD while we fucked. I'm pretty open minded but that felt a little creepy.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
I knew he was a nice guy, because when we switched positions he flipped the mattress so I wouldn't have to lay in a pool of his sweat.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
His dick isn't even good enough to be this much of an asshole
I think my biggest regret in life is not banging you in the science museum
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Randomize
