mutual masturbation is only cool if cash money records is involved.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
He should just accept that I want his dick and his friendship. Can't he understand that I don't do emotions?
If you ever feel goofy just think of the fact that I just shaved the batman symbol into my pubes
He did a backflip because drugs
Dude, she was there with her husband and I was there with my wife. Of course we banged in the bathroom.
Randomize
