This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
watching a depressing episode of spongebob while high is the most depressing thing i have ever experienced
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
Why is there bacon braided in my hair
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
You're going to be mad because I got baked, but not that mad because I'm bringing home kfc.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Randomize
