she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
I just want you to know how happy I am that you are circumcised.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
In other news, I just sent her a video of me masturbating while driving in the rain, so I guess you could say I've mastered Snapchat
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
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