So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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