I wish i was in the wii world.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Wanna shave the hair on my back? If you're offended I was joking, if not I'll bring booze and maybe you can do other regions too.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I don't know if I'm more disturbed by the fact that you hooked up with a dude with one arm, or that "hook up with a dude with one arm" was on your bucket list.
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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