he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Just saw my father's penis. Don't know what to say.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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