At the pride parade. It's not even noon and I'm drunk as shit... for equality of course
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
I tried telling the cop that I don't do drugs, and that if he'd just take me home I could prove it by showing him my D.A.R.E. certificate.
Found plan b box covered with blood. In kitchen sick. Pickle jar is empty. Wtf happened?
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Let's stay in this weekend and play drinking games to the Winter Olympics.
As long as we can drink anytime we see a stray dog, mafia looking Russian or double toilet.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I mean if you can't appreciate a good looking dick then just get out.
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I didn't even know we were hiding from the cops, I was just playing with the cats. People kept telling me to be quiet the cops are here and I was like DID YOU SEE THIS CAT!?
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
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